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April 6th. The last day of spring break.

I drag my and Mayu's bags, which had completely become like decorative objects, out into the living room.
I also get out the uniforms I'd washed, ironed, and put away, checking them over before nodding to myself.
I finish the preparations so I won't panic even if I oversleep a bit tomorrow. Lately, opportunities to sleep even during the day have multiplied, making the daylight hours feel even shorter than in winter, ironically.
Is this Mayu's influence, too?
The two of us, sleeping blissfully without even eating lunch.
A calm life, unsuited for the likes of us, had been continuing.
I'd like to take this chance to establish some stable days, but it's not that simple.
A student's duty is to study, and the place for that is school.
Though it's worrying whether Mayu will obediently agree and put her arms through the sleeves of her uniform tomorrow.
Before I get lost in thought, maybe I should get some sleep myself first.

Sunlight filtering gently through the trees... that was the plan, but my reality was never going to proceed so conveniently.
Besides, since when did the setting switch to dozing in the shade of a tree? "Even when you lie, keep the context straight!" lectured a fictional senior from a fictional club. That's a lie too, of course.
In reality, I was trying my best to sleep back-to-back with Fushimi on the bed in the room, starting from daytime. I figured if she recognized it was daytime, Fushimi, setting me aside, might lower her guard a little and invite sleep in. Maybe the sleep demon is feeling famished too, linked to the condition of its host body on this 'business trip,' because its actions aren't very lively. That's why various considerations become necessary.
And since Fushimi had requested ["When"] ["Sleeping"] ["Stay"] ["Nearby"] ["Please"], we ended up adopting this irregular sleeping position. Having our shoulders touching was scrapped due to the state of my body.
The spring air dries the tip of my nose.
Both Fushimi and I lay with our legs stretched out, like stuffed animals abandoned in the room.

* I wonder if Mayu in the hospital is spending her time decadently like this on her bed, too.
I should apologize eventually for not being able to 'digest' the entire spring break together with Mayu.
Because she'll probably get mad if she remembers.

April 7th. The new school term.

The year begins – third year of high school, a time for choosing paths that could sway one's entire life.
Just how important that first step is has seeped into my very being through intense pain beyond description, but skipping the first day is already a certainty. I wonder how we're being treated out there in the world.
While adding that to the agenda, Fushimi and I were having a secret meeting inside a toilet stall. In my current state, I can't do a single thing in the toilet. Can't even enjoy reading or doing kanji drills. Thus, pleasant conversation was about the only way to use it.

[Family] [Already] [Home]
"I see. Once we get out of here, I'll have to go apologize to your parents."
"M-m-m-marr... a-approval?"
"Why would I need to ask your lion-like parents for permission to welcome a chicken into the family? It's because I got their daughter involved in this mess. I have to apologize for that."
"N-n-n-no. You don't have to do that, it's fine."
"No, it's not for your sake, Fushimi. It's for mine."
"Even so, it's really not okay."
"You shouldn't obstruct another person's self-satisfaction, tsk!"
"This place... is scary. I hate it, it's the worst, I want to run away... But there was just one good thing."
"...Well, true, the sashimi on the first day *was* delicious."
[Hero]
"Huh?"
"Not the world, not mysterious, but discovered."
"...Okay?"
*Yaaay,* went Yuzu-Yuzu, raising both hands expressionlessly in the cramped stall.

April 8th. Attacked.
Only fear enveloped the day.

April 9th.
I have to admire myself for managing to greet the morning sun, thinking this from early on.
"Looks... okay now..."
I peek my face out the door and check left and right down the hallway. Then, I step onto the carpet, grimacing in response to my tightly bound arms, and awkwardly exit the room. After searching for any sign of movement once more, I declare, "It's okay," to Fushimi, who's stuck to the door, unwilling to move away, and invite her out.
When brightness returns indoors, I somehow feel like the storm has passed, a sense of release. Strange, considering people can attack others regardless of the time.
Incidentally, my stomach and intestines, having had nothing to eat or drink, are also feeling *too* released, tormented by stomach acid.

Yesterday, Kouzou-san attacked me. His weapon was scissors, his chosen expression, fury. Still just anger. Not running into madness, maintaining his self gets high marks, but that's cancelled out by his accompanying actions.
Kouzou-san's attack happened when Fushimi was taking a bath for the first time in two days, in the room assigned to us.
The idea that I was teasing her through the door, asking things like, "So where do you wash first in the bath~?", is a massive lie.
Instead, Kouzou-san burst in during what, in a normal household, would be a time for relaxed family gathering, a moment to exhale with relief.
There's no way I clicked my tongue, thinking, *Fushimi was just about to confess, too.*
For a moment, I suspected he'd appeared as Mayu's proxy to purge us. Just as you'd expect from the Ooe household, which has no connection whatsoever to personal information protection laws, the keyless door permitted intrusion all too easily.
While swinging his weapon and arms, Kouzou-san asserted, in a shouting voice that was hard to understand, his plan to kill everyone and finally kill himself, thereby not just destroying the 'egg' but making it as if it never existed.
*Then just die yourself first,* is the kind of complaint that flies out from the one being dragged along towards the organizer, but alas, due to the order of things, it doesn't work that way. And so, the weakest one, me, was appointed as the practice dummy for this murder tutorial.
The sound of the shower from the bathroom had been eliminated by Fushimi's fear, so when I put on an act, shouting, "You haven't laid a hand on Fushimi, have you?!" Kouzou-san surprisingly believed me. He immediately chased after me when I fled the room. Honest people are so likeable, aren't they?
During the struggle and escape, I got lightly gouged around my side with the scissors, but conversely, I couldn't help but feel the arrival of great fortune in getting away with just that. It was fortunate that my opponent wasn't in perfect condition either.
And so, I ran down the hallway at the fastest speed my current stamina allowed, tumbled down the stairs, hid behind something, and somehow managed to get through it. My faint hope that I might pass someone and shift the target onto them was crushed, so I carefully returned to the room and barricaded myself in the toilet with Fushimi, whose skin hadn't fully dried yet.

After that, since I don't run a bakery, we weren't attacked again, but the night, tense enough to make my stomach flip inside out, certainly gave the impression it had shortened our lifespans. Just kidding, though.
Both Fushimi and I were subjected to forced sleep midway through, for separate reasons. For me, the fall down the stairs caused the pain in my arms, which had been in a lull, to flare up again, and I lost consciousness, half-fainting. Fushimi, due to consecutive days of sleep deprivation, reached the limit of her active time. We should have at least taken turns making friends with the sleep demon; our carelessness was quite something.
That's precisely why a sigh of admiration escaped me when I woke up. I learned anew, firsthand, that doing your best isn't what's important; what matters more is achieving the best result, no matter the form.
Regarding the fact that Kouzou-san hadn't attacked again, Fushimi predicted, ["Maybe he fell asleep midway,"] but I considered the possibility that Kouzou-san had been murdered.
This is the moment when the difference between grittiness and the reek of blood becomes apparent.
Whether you stay quiet in your room or doze in the hallway, when it's time to be killed, you die. Therefore, it was decided in our meeting to take action rather than sit and wait. First, we decided to ask Yuna for cooperation in protection. She doesn't prey on others, nor does she have the desire to kill. I'm convinced she's that kind of person. It's not trust, but I believe I understand her.

Heading for Yuna's room, I step into the hall that serves as the passageway, my breathing and steps unsteady.
A hungry ghost was there.
Fushimi and I stop for a moment, but she's already noticed us, so escape is sealed off by her gaze and the kitchen knife in her right hand.
In the corner of the room, Natane-san, who had captured a brown insect, had her left arm surrounded by bandages.
"Oh, hello there~. It's been a while, hasn't it~."
She laughs vacantly, keeping us in check.
As expected, her healthy complexion stood out within the mansion. She'd managed to maintain her somewhat extra padding, too.
"An insect, you see~, came out of the kitchen, so I was chasing it. Can't let food escape, you know~."
Catching my eye, she makes a declaration of predation, as if combining two meanings.
"That injury on your left hand... who did it?" Surely she hadn't eaten her own arm as part of some self-harm ritual...
"Ah, this, you see~... Ehehe."
After a bashful giggle, she starts giving a summarized explanation of last night's big chase.
Apparently, yesterday, the rabid Kouzou-san and Natane-san, a ghoul incarnate, fought, and she barely managed to secure victory. She sacrificed one arm, but it seems the food situation allowed her to overcome the difference in physique and led to his defeat.
The thin, weakened cat became weak meat, unable to corner the nutritious field mouse.
........ "Master Kouzou, at the end, he was desperately trying to shoot his pistol. The bullets had run out, so he was truly a miserable sight, but it was dangerous, wasn't it~. The reason I wasn't killed~ is thanks to you~."
She glances at Fushimi. Fushimi was just watching Natane warily with the eyes of a small animal. If their positions were reversed, I'd undoubtedly have tormented her with a resentful glare, thinking, *'You meddling bitch!'* Just kidding, though.

"What about Yuna and Akane?"
"Even if you ask me~... Weren't they either broken, killed, or eaten by Master Kouzou, or else they're safe? Isn't it one of those~? I haven't seen them today yet, anyway."
She replies with a somewhat troubled expression. That makes sense. Other people's life-or-death problems greatly relate to the satisfaction level of one's own stomach and intestines, after all. Three days ago, she asked for our 'order' as a social pleasantry, but in reality, she surely had no intention of sharing precious food.
"............. Such scary eyes you have~. I won't give you this insect, you know~."
Natane-san shrugs her shoulders jokingly, evaluating my eyeballs.
Then, as if to clear up a misunderstanding, she waved the knife and her right hand left and right.
"Ah, please rest assured~. I won't eat you two yet~."
The man-eater guarantees our temporary physical safety.
"You two are last, you see~... Because you and I are the biggest strangers to each other in this mansion."
"Well, thank you," I offer my gratitude, extending my heart's tongue.
There's no way I can trust her completely.
And then, we separated, retreating without showing each other our backs.

And so, the number of people in this despair-system locked mansion decreases by one.
People turn into corpses, and then into food for others.

"Happy birthday!"
December 27th. In the middle of winter break, Mayu blessed Mii-kun with her entire being.
Waking up just past noon, Mayu immediately started bouncing on the bed.
Having a day that didn't match my own date of birth in any way turned into a festival commotion, I first looked bewilderedly out the window. Nothing particularly abnormal about the weather. The condition of Mayu's favorite electromagnetic waves seemed good too. Just kidding, though.
While being hugged by Mayu, whose breath was ragged from too much bouncing, I guessed it must be the old Mii-kun's birthday, so I decided to enjoy the bed springs too, while being mindful of my right leg, which hadn't fully healed back then.
Since this was a ceremony scheduled to visit again next year, I easily calculated that I should get used to it early, and devoted myself to playing grasshopper while considering how I should apologize to the person on the floor below.
"Kyaa! Kyuu!" Mayu gets excited, wearing out a pair of ultrasonic straw sandals with her squeals.
While searching my dim memory for what sound a grasshopper makes, I counter-attacked with a strange cry leaning towards a death agony, "Gyuooooo!" The effect didn't seem to improve much.

Paying no mind to me, who looked like soy sauce-colored fluids might spurt out, Mayu smiles with idol worship.
"It's a joyous occasion, isn't it~."
"That's something Maa-chan is more likely to be told someday, *cough cough*."
"If Mii-kun hadn't been born, Maa-chan would have been about to make a pillow out of tears!"
"Maa-chan, you're so talented~," I type on the keyboard installed in my heart, *As if you could make one.*
I imagine it, just a little.
If Mii-kun hadn't existed.
Maa-chan might have been able to hold onto a different happiness.

"We have to celebrate Maa-chan's birthday grandly too, right?"
And so, Mayu isn't being deceived by me *here*.
...... Hmm, it's debatable.
"Ooh, is there maybe a secret present for Maa-chan?"
"Since we're always together, keeping secrets might be impossible."
"Nyufufu, that's true~," she says, reaching for the back of my head, pulling us into an even tighter embrace.
Scrubbing forcefully, she buries her face in the crook of my neck, rubbing her cheek against me,
"Real Mii-kun is here! Real Maa-chan is here! It's full of happiness, like a lie!"
says Mayu, making total affirmation public. Though only one of us is 'real', right?
The terminal point of a spirit that contains polished impurities, precisely because desire, save for one aspect, is completely lacking.
"You know, Maa-chan~, when I'm alone, I don't like myself at all. But when Mii-kun calls me Maa-chan, somehow, lots of things stop bothering me, like, like a mountain!"
Which is it?
"That's why Mii-kun *has* to belong to Maa-chan!"
"........... Right." That's a terribly forceful way to tie things to herself. Then again, Maa-chan leaves even tying bows to others (That's a lie).
"And today, listen, listen, it's Mii-kun's favorite curry!" she declares, tickling my ear with her breath.
"Hohou, the juice of yellowed vegetables and meat, you say?" I feel like drawing a couple of blue lines under that.
The curry Mayu makes is too sharp-tasting; I'm actually not a big fan. It's not like my tongue has the depth to enjoy such flavors.
"Moo, your reaction is weak! Mii-kun needs to be more, like, *whoa-hey, whoa-hey*!"
Mayu demands this incomprehensible element from me with hand gestures like the Tanko Bushi coal mining song. No, I really don't get it.
"That's because, you know, Maa-chan herself is preferable," I equivocate in the tone of a fairy tale wolf.
Afterwards, it goes without saying that being clung to and rolled around with on the bed hindered the treatment of my leg.

* Some problems were rooted there, but the flow itself was a calm interaction.
Passing through such a day, my present self was here.

Ah, and today is April 10th.
Fine weather again today; outside it's perfect for laundry, inside the iron bars are blooming madly.
Hang out the bedsheets, and napping Maa-chan is in a good mood too.

April 11th.
The suffering that accompanies living began to intrude all the way to the surface. Sluggish internal organs, and the affected parts of my arms continuing to buzz as if infested with maggots. And the combination of disagreeably sharp five senses threw my body's incompetence into relief.
Fushimi was sleeping beside me. Her life had become completely reversed, day for night, and only now, when the strong sunlight (please imagine this is currently happening in a typical household) poured intermittently through the window, did her eyelids finally fatigue as if returned from space.
As for me, it was as if even my desire for sleep had withered away; my eyes were creepily, brilliantly sharp, and even in the darkness, I was afflicted by symptoms where faint, poor-quality light would occasionally flutter into the back of my eyes. I couldn't even yawn anymore.
And, as I stayed still, huddled up, assailed by boredom, the insides of my body grew so irritable it felt like I wanted to scratch and tear out my own organs.
Since I didn't go outside yesterday either, I want to enjoy a walk. The outside world, where sunbathing and forest bathing are regulated away, spreads out just beyond the door, but going out while Fushimi is awake now creates a composition of one in favor and one opposed, so I can only achieve my release in the current situation where she is 'mouthless'. What my desire is seeking is hard even for me to understand.

I go out into the hallway, hook the key on my fingertips, and lock the door with great effort. Then, alone, I head to the first floor to pay Keiko-san a visit.
Keiko-san's corpse, which I hadn't seen in a while, had become quite authentic before I knew it. When the wind changes, a putrid smell faintly wafts in from the window, transforming it into a foreign object providing nose-bending ventilation.
"...... She's normally dead, huh."
To the only corpse in this mansion that retains its original form, setting aside coloration, I feel a dull freshness.
Ooe Keiko. The mastermind who dutifully reproduced life and death, even though she should have been able to achieve her plan just by pretending to be dead.
When you welcomed me, I should have paid a little more attention to appearances and harbored some doubt.
I'd even lost sight of the basic principle that sweet talk has a hidden side. Just kidding, though.
Sometimes you just have to go along with the story and struggle when necessary. Even someone like me.
However, this means the only one left drawing Ooe family blood is just Yuna, huh? No, even Akane's origins are suspicious when compared against this family's values.
"...... Hm?"
There's a creaking sound, and my ears and neck are drawn to it. Taking my time, I carefully turn around.
That's a lie.
At the back of the hallway stand a useless safe and an old-fashioned locker that looks like it couldn't get a role. From there, Ooe Yuna, looking as if she's currently under the influence of an ability called 'Gradual Skeletonization,' having omitted too much waste from her physique, appeared, opening the locker door. Today, she's wrapped in a yukata the color of the aged green bruises scattered on Ikeda Kouta's body, looking like she could write 'kite' on an application form and have it accepted without issue. Since I didn't see her yesterday, I'd mistakenly assumed she'd already been rescued. Telling cool lies is an advanced technique, one I don't think I can manage.
"What kind of entrance is that?"
With footsteps still lacking no sense of stability, she carelessly approaches close enough to me, then opens her mouth.
"I sensed someone coming this way, so I tried hiding. It would be trouble if it were Natane, wouldn't it?"
"Why are you pouting your lips discontentedly?"
Yuna touches my mouth with her finger as if confirming something, whispering in my ear. My goosebumps are so thrilled they feel like they might shed my skin. Given my already meager fleshiness, I hope it stays put.
"Hiding itself is fine. But I hate using lockers."
"Oh? Why is that? This is our secret place, just for the two of us."
"I'd prefer it if you kept it treasured away just for yourself, though."
"How cold of you. Do you have a past where you were trapped in a locker and injected with three-day-old leftover milk through the gap?"
Your way of thinking just completely overlaps with mine.
"It's too much trouble to explain, so please refer to volume two of 'My Cohabitation Diary with Her'."
"Well, your private life has become quite popularized, hasn't it."
"Absolutely. The Personal Information Protection Law is negligent beyond belief."
Anyway, this dimension-twisting adult conversation should probably wrap up now; I'm troubled because there's no particular main topic.
"It's boring, isn't it. Where's that eloquence you're so good at?"
」 My silence.
」 Yuna's imitation of silence.
"I'm lacking material because I'm bored."
In response to this exchange, like arguing the first-come-first-served order of the chicken and the egg, Yuna nods exaggeratedly.
"Yes, I'm bored too. How do you two enjoy your leisure time during the day?"
"Hmm, solo musical chairs, maybe."
"In the world, that's called 'sitting down,' you know."
For an eighteen-year-old who doesn't attend school, that was a worldly retort.
"Our kind of people have an advantage, don't we? We have too much free time, but we're fine even letting fear run free."
"If I hadn't realized a way to deal with the problem, I might have panicked a little more."
Especially since I have various filtered sediments of old grudges against this land settling within me.
Yuna turns her gaze toward Keiko-san—excuse me, the corpse.
"What's Akane doing?" I asked, without looking at Yuna.
"She appears frequently in Touka's room. I can't grasp her intention, though."
"Remembering the deceased, probably," I state, a viewpoint lacking in both experience and consideration.
Yuna also peers out the window from beside me, looking down on Keiko-san. Though "looking down at" didn't seem quite right.
"What did you come here for?"
"To watch Mother's body decay faster than ours, I thought I'd kill some time."
"......... Do you resent Keiko-san?"
"Of course not. I'm very grateful to her. That's why I have to make use of her corpse, too."
Yuna didn't let the corners of her mouth, oozing obviousness, falter, dismissing it with a single, distorted smile.
I guess that's one way of thinking.
"Actually, why did Keiko-san start this game, I wonder?"
"............. Hmmm, Mother isn't just a corpse, and yet there seems to be no reply. Her hearing or her tongue—I'm intensely curious which one has rotted and become unusable."
"No, the question's for you. It's about your mother, right?" I say jokingly.
In response, Yuna, while maintaining her light tone, solemnly shifted the skin on her face.
"Did I offend you?"
"As if you, in my position, would sprout such an emotion?"
"Of course. I'm absurdly mother-traumatized."
"Mother-trauma? Is that a type of fish?"
"It's short for 'Mother Trauma'." Just kidding, though. I didn't quite manage to cultivate a new axis in the Japanese language.
Yuna gives up on my nonsense and looks down at 'Mother'. For a short time, she engages in a one-sided staring contest, then gives up on that too.
"Even gazing at Mother's corpse like this, no reason occurs to me other than 'because she wanted to try it'."
"Hmm, in that case, Keiko-san is completely childish."
"That's right. I'm sure the motive for transferring me into the Ooe family was to scout the wise and talented me, by all means."
"Just kidding, though."
Allowance.
Without distinguishing whether I'm acting as proxy for Keiko-san or Yuna, I fulfill the duty.
Then, I tilted the target of my interest slightly to the left.
"Even though you were kidnapped, you're grateful."
I wasn't kidnapped myself, but considering Maa-chan's existence, the question just pops out.
Yuna, while adjusting the collar of her yukata, gently raised the degree of seriousness in the air.
"The polished feeling of gratitude, thinking it was okay to truly think of her as a mother, overflowed for only about the first three months at most. But that's fine, isn't it? It's far healthier than dragging things out endlessly, just being careful because the thread hasn't broken. When people hold something for another, it's enough if the quantity and quality exceed common sense even for just a moment. As long as you reach that single moment, things like bonds become unnecessary afterwards."
Eloquently explaining this derivative of momentarism to me, Yuna's eyes roll back from breathlessness. It's because she talked too much at once, despite her chronically rock-bottom stamina. Pressing her face slightly, Yuna nevertheless continues to convert her stamina into words.
"I demand your opinion regarding that."
"I'm not good with that kind of philosophy. I've never even thought about it—"
"Oh? Not good at it despite never having thought about it? How wise and full of insight you are."
"It's because I'm bad at it that thinking up the first step is impossible."
As we were having this relatively peaceful conversation, the wind direction shifted to a headwind, and the thing I feared...
...wielded its fierce power.
In the calm spring climate, the air, blended with the foul stench, melts the consciousness of my skin.
Yuna pinched her nose and took a step back from the window.
"I'm heading back to my room soon, but what about you, Amano-kun?"
"That surname is currently exclusive to Sanae-san and is not in use by me."
"Oh, is that so?" she says, abandoning the sarcasm without the slightest lingering attachment.
"After I walk around the mansion a little more, I'll go back to my room too."
"Ah, leaving her behind in the room, are you?"
"As a third-person reference, that's correct, but it's inappropriate for expressing our relationship."
"Is this where you say, 'Just kidding, though'?"
"As if a healthy high school student would tell such a lie!"
And with that, Yuna leaves.
Without even seeing her off, I relax my shoulders, my face smirking at the result.
It was worth talking while cramping my abs to make sure our sentences didn't overlap.
Formally speaking, just kidding, though.

April 12th. My body was starting to reach its limit.
When I woke up, I thought my feet were buried in the carpet. Both feet were sluggish, difficult to lift. Nausea tormented my stomach. What does it want me to vomit up now?