I spoke to Viol.
"I have to go to the Arsen Kingdom."
The logistics were daunting, but not going wasn't an option either.
As I explained that I absolutely had to go to the Arsen Kingdom and treat the epidemic patients, Viol replied.
"Looks like you overdid the workout today. The kid's talking nonsense."
"I'm saying this with a clear mind."
"Enough, I won't hear any more of it!"
At first, she dismissed it as nonsense, but when I insisted strongly, she refused even to listen.
"Why are you suddenly acting like this?!"
Alios, aghast, also tried to dissuade me.
"Something feels ominous. Remember before, when you listened to my words and avoided the demon attack?"
"Are you saying you feel a bad premonition now, just like back then?"
"Yes, if I don't stop it, the situation will worsen."
For me, that is.
Unable to explain the real reason, I made something up, which naturally drew protests.
"Ceres, that's enough!!"
Hames, who had tolerated my stubbornness until now, grabbed my shoulder as if she couldn't take it anymore.
"I told you to do it for yourself! Why won't you listen? Why are you always like this?!"
"Sorry."
No matter how much they tried to stop me, I couldn't give up on this.
"Look, realistically, it's impossible for you to go anywhere in that body."
"You're barely able to walk!"
This time, Alios and Hames tried to persuade me by pointing out the practical impossibility.
They argued that even if they took me, if I had an episode on site, I wouldn't be in any condition to treat anyone.
Honestly, I agreed.
So, what I needed now was a way to heal my body in a short period.
"Sibylius. You said it would take a few months to heal. I've already received treatment for a month. What's left is only a few times the effort I've put in so far. Isn't there a way to shorten it?"
When I asked Sibylius, the expert, she hesitated before finally speaking.
"...It is possible. Especially for you, it's a method with a 100% success rate."
She knew such a method existed but hadn't mentioned it until now.
I felt a sense of foreboding, and it seemed the others did too.
"There's something called muscle memory. The training you've done for a month is stored in your body. We just need to amplify that memory manifold, forcing your body to recall it."
"...Wouldn't months' worth of fatigue hit all at once? Won't I die?"
"You would. That's why it's a method only you can perform."
Because I have divine power and won't die, it meant I could succeed 100%—in terms of survival.
But it would be painful.
More painful than anything I'd experienced so far.
Alios and Hames fell silent, looking utterly dumbfounded.
Then Viol shouted in an incredulous tone.
"What on earth are you trying to achieve by going this far?!"
Good question.
What exactly do I want, to be doing this?
It's ultimately for my own survival, but I'm not alone here now.
Unlike the original male leads who were absent during crucial times, these four women have diligently helped me for a month.
I could rely on their help, so why am I trying to do this myself, enduring tremendous pain?
Thinking and thinking,
I suddenly realized and unconsciously murmured.
"I... want Ceres's dignity."
It was an inner desire that left even myself stunned.
Poor Ceres.
She committed no crime, yet just because she was beautiful, she endured all sorts of humiliation and insults only to die.
I don't like it.
I want to change it.
Whatever happens, with my own hands.
Saying I'm thinking too seriously about a novel character is meaningless.
Because I myself am Ceres now.
In this world, right now, there is no one who can empathize with Ceres more than I can.
It's for Ceres, and at the same time, it's for myself.
So, unconsciously, I desired to resolve the major events of the original work with my own hands, by my own will.
"To only realize this now."
Discovering my true feelings, which even I hadn't known until now, felt absurd yet liberating.
Now, I could say it without regret.
"I'll do the condensed training method. Right now."
Ceres lay on the bed as if dead.
Sibylius had initiated the condensed training method, but the effects weren't immediate.
He had fallen asleep first, and the four women stood surrounding the sleeping figure, looking down at him.
All wore expressions of utter gloom.
Logically, they should never have allowed such a thing, and if he had persisted, they should have resorted to confinement.
But—
"What could he have meant?"
Because of what Ceres had said, they couldn't bring themselves to do that.
"Wanting 'Ceres's dignity'?"
Alios recalled Ceres's words.
Isn't Ceres himself?
Speaking as if referring to another person was strange, but the weight behind the words was also significant.
"It sounded like someone willing to face danger for someone precious..."
"Thinking normally, he probably used the third person for himself for special emphasis."
Hames replied.
"Unless there are two Cereses, there's no need to overthink it. He literally wants his own dignity."
"But why would he want that!"
Viol exclaimed in frustration.
"Is there anyone here who doesn't know who he is? It's Ceres! The famous person whose name is known even if mine isn't. The precious child of the Empire's top Count family and the Empire's greatest beauty! Why would someone like that suddenly want dignity?"
Viol couldn't understand.
What could he possibly lack that would make him seek dignity by undergoing such torture?
It was then.
"Perhaps even that affluent environment couldn't satisfy his self-esteem."
Sibylius, who had been quiet, joined the conversation.
"Then he coincidentally gained healing abilities. Maybe he's trying to build self-esteem and confirm his own dignity by helping others."
"Then why did his self-esteem drop? Did that wench Ares secretly abuse Ceres while we weren't looking?!"
Sibylius shook her head at the shouting Emperor.
"You don't understand. Things like 'precious child of the Count family' or 'Empire's greatest beauty' are meaningless."
"What?"
"What use are they to someone who can barely move and can only live indoors?"
His body was so weak it wasn't even certain if he could inherit the County.
Even if his appearance was beautiful, he couldn't go outside to flaunt that beauty.
'Since he can't experience it, everything must feel like mere words. Just like it did for me.'
Sibylius recalled her childhood.
Her mother, a demon, had doted on the daughter she had with a human.
Keeping her confined at home so she wouldn't be in danger, she whispered daily:
You possess the greatest potential.
You're still young, but if you grow, you could even become the Demon King, so just endure for a little while.
These weren't empty words.
Considering Sibylius's current power, her mother's insight was accurate.
But so what?
'To my younger self, it didn't feel real; it was just pie in the sky.'
Even if she could become the Demon King in the future, her present reality was being trapped at home, unable to meet anyone.
Even after becoming an adult, due to this childhood experience and discrimination, she disliked everything and ended up not becoming the Demon King but practically living in self-imposed seclusion.
'Words and reality are disconnected, so I don't even know what I am, and my self-esteem feels low. Are you feeling that way too?' Sibylius thought, looking at the sleeping Ceres. 'Is that why you find your reason for existence by healing people?'
Given how he drastically changed upon hearing the news of the epidemic and insisted on going even if it meant pushing himself unreasonably, Sibylius couldn't help but think that way.
'Perhaps we had more in common than I thought.'
Living together for a month while treating him, she had inadvertently grown fond of him.
Thinking they might share a relatable past, Sibylius's expression softened as she looked at Ceres.
At that moment.
"AAAAARGH! AAAACK!!!"
Ceres began screaming madly, and the four quickly checked his condition.
"Ah, ahah!!"
"Ceres, are you alright?"
"Snap out of it!"
Hames and Alios held onto Ceres and called his name, but he only continued to scream.
'Why, why is this happening? Even if pain is felt, it should definitely succeed, yet my heart is pounding.'
Watching the suffering Ceres, Sibylius felt an inexplicable fear.
As she stood stunned, Viol, unable to watch any longer, shouted.
"Stop this quickly!"
"Y-yes, understood."
Though she knew it should succeed, she found herself complying with the request unconsciously.
For some reason, her hands trembled and her heart raced, making it difficult even to cancel the process properly.
Then—
Suddenly, Ceres's screams stopped.
It should have been a good thing, but everyone's heart lurched for a moment.
The silence was so abrupt they worried he might have died, but upon checking—
"He opened his eyes?"
"Did you regain consciousness!"
Viol, surprised, and Alios, delighted, saw Ceres wide awake.
Hames quickly tried to heal him with holy power, but it wasn't necessary.
"What are you doing?"
Hames was shocked to see Ceres walking perfectly normally towards a corner of the room.
Because Ceres had grabbed the massive barbell placed there.
It had been prepared as exercise equipment, but it was too heavy for Ceres to use, so it had just been left untouched.
Gripping the bar, which weighed over 100 kilograms, with his small hands—
"It feels light?"
Seeing the unbelievable strength emerging from his slender arms, Ceres smiled with satisfaction.