Eight years ago, when I was freed from captivity, a policewoman named Nagatsuki appeared. She's that kind of person.
"So, should we pack up?"
Ideally, I'd declare this alone, stand up, and leave the scene with flair.
"Huh?"
I can't stand up. In fact, I clumsily fall over.
Right next to Sugawara, I end up face down, looking quite intimate.
"Oh dear, must be one of those dizzy spells you get during growth spurts... suddenly... feeling..."
Heat is returning to the empty parts of my body. And as a complication, the once-gone sense of pain is also returning. I can feel every drop of blood trickling over my skin. As soon as I tried to leave this place, was someone casting white magic upon this land?
"Ah... maybe. Perhaps the connection I have with someone is influencing me, causing my brain to release its own narcotics."
Hooray for endorphins! Keep pushing just a bit more.
I try various things. I attempt to move using just my right arm and left leg, imitating a zombie escaping from a graveyard, crawling on the gravel.
"Ugh, I don't have enough spirit."
My left arm won't bend. My upper body is convulsing. My right leg looks like a red fountain almost ready to be opened to the public in a park. Just this much restricts human movement. Blowing people away, disappearing, or multiplying are all far-fetched dreams.
I thought injuries other than to the torso or head wouldn't be fatal, but having two large holes seems dangerous. Maybe it's because an artery was severed? The amount of blood pouring out, as unlikely as a fishing expert digging up the Tokugawa buried treasure, torments my body temperature. I'm freezing. My teeth won't meet properly.
"Hemostasis..."
The hemostatic method I learned in health class is the first thing I forgot along with the blood. I don't even have the energy to apply it.
"This is bad... It's not like I can't feel anything. Maybe I should call an ambulance?"
But what would my uncles say? My reputation is already at rock bottom after the jumping incident. My aunt might even execute me. Is their overprotection of me like the alphabet character resembling the number 1? If so, before being happy about it, I'd demand an explanation. Also, why they took me in, because I'm all ears.
Even at times like this, I yawn.
"I'm sleepy..."
If I fall asleep, will I die? Even though it's night, the edges of my vision are white. That white gradually transforms into the shape of a naked angel, starting to plow a field full of dandelions. It looks like a poorly skilled group mimicking agrarian tribes, farming. If I shout at them to go home after stuffing dandelion fluff in their ears, it would truly be the end of my life. But unfortunately, I don't see such a thing. At most, people without legs.
"Ah..."
It happened before, this feeling.
When I suffered a fatal injury and felt sleepy.
The scar from that time still remains on my head.
I grew out my hair without combing it to hide it.
But during a hot summer, annoyed, I cut it off.
I wondered who I needed to hide it from.
The refreshing feeling then was even clearer than taking a cold shower... Wait, what?
This is my life flashing before my eyes.
"This isn't good."
Is the third time the charm? Is what the old folks say true?
... I want to try it.
The madman within me insisted, and I readily accepted.
I decided to sleep.
I'll leave behind everything about my family, Mayu, Sugawara, the teacher, Nagatsuki-san, those kids, school, exams, happiness, and being 'Me-kun'.
Leaving everything behind, I'll sleep alone.
Neither wishing to live nor die.
Just a little break, a little break.
I was a fool.
I dreamed that people could live that honestly.
I was deceived by those young siblings until the very end.
I later found out they didn't keep their promise.
From the tales of old, "XX and I",
All the adults have passed away.
My father, Ma-chan's parents, and my sister's mother too. "I thought I was scared. That's a lie.
I thought I was sad. That's a lie.
I wanted to cry. That's a lie.
It's all lies.
Because I don't understand what those words mean or what's happening.
What's really happening to me?
The policewoman didn't give any answers.
She just smiled kindly and cried a lot.
My father came home with a boy and a girl.
The boy had short hair and big, round eyes. The girl was petite, with a low nose and red eyes, staring at the boy. Both of them were tied up tightly with hemp ropes, and their mouths were gagged with cloth.
It felt strange.
Ever since my older brother died, my father had been acting weird. He used to be so quiet, but now he's become very cheerful. Sometimes he even talked to the radio. And now he started talking to me. Though I'm a boy, people said I resembled my deceased mother, and for some reason after that, he'd hit or bite me.
From the top of the stairs, I watched my father's actions and told my younger sister's mother about it after seeing him hide something. She always looked grumpy like my father used to be, but she never hit me, so I preferred her over my current father.
When I told her about my father and the boy and girl, she told me to run away with a scared look. She quickly told me to go to a neighbor's house and tell them there's a kidnapper. I didn't understand and asked, "Kidnapper?" She told me, unusually laughing, to watch more TV and pulled me up. Instead of heading towards the room's entrance, she approached the window to unlock it. Outside the window was a backyard, where I often got beaten up by my sister. She tried to throw me outside. I wanted to ask what she'd do, but I hesitated, unsure of how to address her, as she was my sister's mother.
Then, my father entered the room with a terrifying laugh.
She pushed me outside.
I fell on my elbows, and they bled, but I was more afraid of my father, so I ran towards the entrance, as she had told me.
Outside, there were only paddy fields, and I had no idea where to go. But I decided to head to the primary school. On the way, there's Yokkun's house and Mrs. Takeda's house.
As I was running through the middle of the paddy field, my father chased after me.
I wanted to ask what happened to my sister's mother. I turned around and saw a red stain on the bat my father was holding.
Just that made me understand and cry out of fear.
He was catching up fast. Though I was good at running, I wasn't used to escaping, and soon ran out of breath. My feet felt like they weren't even touching the ground.
Then, I tripped at the border between the paddy field and the path, falling down.
It hurt and I was so scared that tears flowed out. I wanted to run, but it was hard to breathe, and my body hurt so much it couldn't move.
But I should have kept running.
A shadow loomed over me.
My foot was stepped on hard, and I heard a dull, crushing sound.
It was the most painful feeling ever.
Then, my head was hit with the bat.
It didn't hurt at all, but I became very sleepy. The story of the day my father came home after kidnapping a boy and a girl.
The place I realized I was alive, three days later, was a hospital.
My left arm had half its flesh scraped off, and my right thigh suffered severe injuries due to some vascular issues.
But perhaps death really despised me, for I survived with ease.
By engaging the opponent with a desperate story and striking during a momentary lapse in their concentration, I prevailed using a tactic often employed by third-rate thugs. It was bittersweet.
I found solace in the logic of "the victor writes history" as I lamented my distance from the role of the protagonist. Or at least, I should have.
Two days after awakening, as of November 5th,
I felt imprisoned by words, rather than feeling like the victor.
"Idiot", "Ha...", "Dumbass", "Even if you insult me in a dialect", "Stupid dumbass",
"That means 'good-for-nothing', right?"
Nagatsuki-san's smile was as radiant as ever today. Wearing a gray suit and letting down her hair, she looked like a job-hunting college student.