CHAPTER 6
A week had passed since Shishiroka collapsed.
The cause, as expected, was the Seed of Hanna.
The seed had already left Shishiroka with a frail body.
It was eating away at her faster than anyone had anticipated, to the point where even her teenage body could no longer endure it.
Shishiroka was now confined to her bed.
Her legs could no longer support her properly, and she would constantly stumble and fall.
Rapiel spent several days looking after her.
But even with her Holy Magic, there was nothing she could do for Shishiroka.
In the end, Shishiroka became unable to leave her sickbed.
Sunlight streamed into the room.
Shishiroka was staring endlessly out the window.
Where she was looking, two sparrows sat on a tree branch.
The sparrows chirped away, seemingly finding something immensely entertaining between themselves.
“Shishiroka-sunbaenim.”
“Ah, Harua-hubae.”
At my call, Shishiroka turned to look at me.
In just a week, she had grown even thinner than before. Her arms were gaunt, and her legs were even worse.
In the span of only a week, her condition had deteriorated rapidly.
Perhaps she had been pushed to her limit long before this.
She had just been pretending to be as stoic as possible.
Her body had been breaking down and dying for a long time.
A book lay on the bedside table next to Shishiroka.
It was a tome on the theory of Holy Magic.
Shishiroka still hadn't given up on mastering it.
Whether it was bearing fruit or not, she remained steadfast.
“You know what? Master Rapiel was bullying me again today.”
I made a point to recount the day's events as energetically as I could in front of her.
It had become one of my daily routines.
Shishiroka seemed to enjoy my stories, and she would sometimes laugh.
Lately, when I ran out of things to talk about, I would even tell her stories about Earth.
To Shishiroka, every one of them was a wondrous tale, and her eyes would often sparkle.
“When you get back on your feet, let’s go there together someday.”
I never forgot to add a final word of encouragement.
“Yes, that sounds like it would be really fun.”
Shishiroka never said that she would go with me.
Another month passed in the blink of an eye.
My Holy Magic was beginning to show real results. Rapiel wasn't lying when she said I had a talent for it.
Shishiroka, on the other hand, grew progressively thinner.
Her limbs were nearly just bone, and the rest of her body was the same.
Her chest was so sunken you could see her ribs, and her cheeks were hollow.
She had even lost consciousness recently, forcing Rapiel to rush over in the middle of the night.
The Holy Magic book was still by her side.
The amount of time Shishiroka spent sleeping increased.
When she woke up, I would greet her, and she would give a small smile.
These days, I told even more exaggerated stories.
I had quite liked reading books as a child, so thankfully I had a large repertoire of tales to tell.
Shishiroka often laughed at my exaggerated expressions.
She still smiled a lot.
Another month went by.
My Seed was as incredibly hard as Rapiel had said.
It showed no signs of cracking or sprouting.
I guess becoming a great Holy Mage wasn't going to be easy.
Shishiroka was now awake for less than two hours a day.
She spent most of her time sleeping.
When she did wake up, she often had trouble distinguishing whether reality was a dream or not.
I talked to her as I always did.
Her laughter had lessened compared to before.
So I acted even more theatrically.
And she would smile, just a little.
A week passed.
During that time, Shishiroka once slept for two straight days.
Her condition was so critical that Rapiel had stayed by her side for a full day.
“Harua-hubae.”
I was talking to her after she had woken up for the first time in a while, when she called my name.
“If Shishiroka had a talent like yours, Harua-hubae… do you think I could have lived longer?”
Talent as a Holy Mage.
I hadn't even managed to make my talent bloom yet.
But Shishiroka envied that talent of mine.
Because if she’d had it, there might have been a chance, however small, for her to live.
“You know, Shishiroka… had a lot of things she wanted to do. I wanted to go to the 2nd World, go on adventures, and later, I wanted to get married and have children.”
Things that anyone might dream of at least once.
Shishiroka had dreamed of them too.
“But… I guess that was too greedy for Shishiroka.”
Shishiroka smiled weakly.

Before I knew it, I was holding her hand.
“How is that being greedy?”
Shishiroka’s gaze met mine.
“Anyone can dream. Why is something like that considered greedy?”
Everyone has dreams.
If you get condemned for having a dream, then it’s the world that’s damned.
“Shishiroka, you did your absolute best. There’s no one anywhere who has the right to call you greedy.”
I found myself calling her name casually.
I was no longer using honorifics or keeping a wall between us.
Shishiroka stared up at me blankly.
Then, slowly, the corners of her mouth lifted.
“You’re right. Shishiroka tried her best, didn’t she?”
“Yeah, you really did.”
I, who had spent all this time with her, knew better than anyone how she studied Holy Magic every night until she dozed off.
She no longer looked at the theory book.
She had memorized the entire thing, so now whenever she was awake, she would practice Holy Magic constantly.
I had seen it with my own eyes.
Who could possibly belittle her and say she didn't try?
“Then… I’m glad.”
Shishiroka slowly closed her eyelids.
“Because Shishiroka was a strong person who never gave up until the very end.”
“Shishiroka.”
I called her name.
I felt it instinctively.
The moment she closed her eyes today, she would never wake up again.
This was the end.
What should I say to her in her final moments?
After a brief hesitation, my lips parted.
“My… my Ability is resurrection magic.”
I squeezed her hand tightly.
If you asked me if I had formed a deep bond with Shishiroka, I wouldn't know.
We had only known each other for a few months.
And most of that time was after she had collapsed, so we hadn't done much together.
But she had struggled so desperately to live.
Faced with death, she fought back not with fear, but with an effort so strenuous it was like she was coughing up blood.
Of all the savage This-worlders I had met, she was the one who knew best how to try.
In front of someone like her, I couldn't bear to hide my Ability.
“I can bring you back. I’ll bring you back, I swear it.”
Shishiroka’s eyelids fluttered open faintly.
“You said you wanted to see the sea, right? I’ll go get a carriage from somewhere. Let’s go.
And the 2nd World, I’ll become a great Holy Mage in no time, so we can go there too. And finally, let’s even cross over to Earth. There’s so much to do.”
I would save her and take her to all those places.
That was my declaration.
She looked at our clasped hands, and then at me.
Then, she managed a faint smile.
“Really? That sounds fun.”
And even today.
She didn’t say she would go with me.
“That really… sounds fun.”
Shishiroka’s voice trailed off.
The strength in her hand faded away.
Her broken body slumped onto the bed.
There was still warmth in her hand.
But it was a warmth that felt like it would vanish at any moment.
Light spilled from my grasp.
It was the first time I had used resurrection magic since Bulldog, all to save Shishiroka.
The light spread, reflecting off the window.
My light seeped into Shishiroka’s body.
The white light faded.
Soon, only silence remained in the room.
But Shishiroka did not wake up.
She lay still, her eyes peacefully closed.
“Shishiroka.”

To be honest, I had a vague idea this would happen.
Resurrection magic could certainly bring a person back to life.
But it only restored them to the state they were in just before death.
If Holy Magic could extend one’s lifespan in the first place, there would be no death from old age in this world.
If that were possible, Rapiel would have fixed Shishiroka’s body long ago.
A person whose natural lifespan has ended will die again even if revived, because their time is up.
A body that had reached its physical limit was beyond the help of even Holy Magic.
The one possibility where resurrection magic could fail.
I had always kept this possibility in mind.
That was why, until the very, very end…
I had hesitated to tell Shishiroka the truth.
And in the end, I had only planted false hope in her before sending her off.
No.
Shishiroka probably knew, too.
She had studied the theories of Holy Magic more than anyone.
From the moment she heard my words, she must have known that she couldn't be saved.
That was why she accepted death.
The lingering warmth in Shishiroka’s hand grew distant.
It was a small hand, calloused from turning the pages of her books every day.
“Shishiroka.”

Even when I called her name, she did not wake up again.
The one person who couldn't be saved, even with resurrection magic, was gone.
“Fuck.”
A curse escaped my lips for some reason.
I knew from the start that resurrection magic wasn't omnipotent.
I knew because I was the one who used it.
But it seems that until the very end, I had believed I could save Shishiroka.
“Fuck.”

Cursing once more, I pressed my hands to my face.
Useless.
I hate how fucking useless I am.
It’s not like I had developed deep feelings for Shishiroka.
Just a few months.
There was no way I could have formed a deep bond in that time.
It was just… I hated myself for being the kind of person who, after declaring I would hide my resurrection magic, broke that vow to save a single girl, and still failed to do anything.
What good is resurrection magic, what good is having a talent for Holy Magic?
If I can't even save one dying kid, what kind of fucking talent is that?
No.
I survived this long because I have resurrection magic.
It’s just one This-worlder who died.
It’s not a problem.
As planned, Rapiel will probably take even better care of me now.
There’s no need to waste any more time, so this is for the best.
Think positive.
What’s good is good.
“Shishiroka.”
And yet, there I was, calling her name, hoping she would open her eyes.
I fucking hate this world.
I truly, madly hate it.
I hated this unfair situation, and I hated that even after breaking my own resolve, I couldn't save a single girl.
Grit—
That’s why I didn’t want to live so weakly that I had to accept such unfairness.
I reached out and took a single strand of Shishiroka’s hair.
At my current level, it would take too much mana to resurrect her from just a strand of hair.
It was the same as before; I couldn't revive her now.
But I had made a promise to her.
A promise to save her with resurrection magic.
The first promise I had ever made since falling into this world.
In a world full of lies, I wanted to, at the very least, live truthfully.
So someday, I will find a way to deal with the Seed of Hanna that consumed her. I will become a greater Holy Mage than Rapiel and find that method.
On the day I can solve the problem of the Seed of Hanna and extend her life…
I will keep the promise I made to her today.
“Just… sleep for a little while.”
Perhaps the world found me pathetic, too.
Raindrops streamed down my cheeks.
The weather today was clear.